Pointing The Finger

Unfortunately, the blame for this debacle rests firmly with the only people we can't fire. Ross Ryan and his meagre Fan Base. What is it with these people?

Two years down the track and Ross is starting his album all over again. Terrific. Sure he's been doing some interesting and excellent work recently. CD production, web authoring, theatre sound design, jingle work and even live songwriting netcasts. This is all very well of course but none of these things are making any serious money for our shareholders .

And the so-called Fan Base. When we skimmed the brief of Coathanger's profile prior to the take over, we were under the impression that this Ross Ryan guy (he's not big in Italy either) came with enough people, not only prepared to shell out for a new album - but willing to fanatically spread the word about Ross and this web site, thus allowing us to build up a satisfying database of exploitable customer contacts. This aspect of our initial plan has also not been up to expectations.

Plan B

The following are the steps we've taken to address our fiscal problems.

1. We have come up with a new catchy slogan:
    "Coathanger is an Umbrella".
This slogan will appear in all our publicity and banner ads.

2. Starting with the update of the Coathanger web site, we have begun re-pitching the Ross Ryan product to his established Fan Base.

Instead of marketing him as an exciting and happening kind of guy, we will be focusing more on his weaknesses and insecurities. This will hopefully build up "pity support" for the new album and for RR generally.

Our research has shown that most people would like to support Ross and his music, but feel that he is already so successful, happy, well-rounded and together, he doesn't really need them. Our aim will be to assure these people that this is anything but the case.

Conclusion

Sure we've had our failures - some of them total. Maybe we made a few dodgy calls along the way. Perhaps there are a few differences between the music and auto parts industries. But we feel on top of it. The new Millennium conveniently gives us the opportunity to wrap ourselves in the kind of senseless optimism that only comes along once in a thousand years - and we're going for it.

New Millennium Coathanger is back.

Al  DeKlien
CEO Coathanger Productions